The place: Everywhere

Not so long ago, I was the type of person that when I did something it had to be perfect.  All of the I’s had to be dotted and all of the T’s had to be crossed before any project was sent out.  (Yes I am, by far, my own worst critic). But one day I had to ask myself, why  was I putting so much pressure on myself when no one else did? That time in my life was stressful and chasing perfection was exhausting. We put ourselves under unbearable pressure when we aim to be  the perfect version of who we are.

What it boils down to is doing your best is good enough. When you make the effort to do your best at something, you’ve succeeded in trying your best, no matter what else happens. You may not get the result you hoped for, but you still gave it your best.

Your life is what you make of it, so let go of trying to be perfect and know that giving it your best is definitely good enough!

Most of us live our lives at a very fast pace, trying to cram everything into 24 hours. If you don’t know by now, that simply doesn’t work. We are so concerned with keeping up with everything and everyone else, we easily become discouraged and quit.

Don’t worry about everyone else and what is going on around you, find your own rhythm, what works for you and continue to move forward.  There is no need to be concerned with the runners ahead of you, you have your own race to complete.

So lace up your tennis shoes, hit the track and focus on endurance rather than speed. Commit to being a long distance runner and completing the race meant for you!

1. Slow down and take a deep breath to regain clarity
2. Meditate
3. Continue to move forward and remain focus on what’s ahead

       1. Take Breaks –

We can only focus on something for a   period of time and then we need to step away and rest. Every 45 minutes or so, step away from your project and step outside for some fresh hair or do a chore around the house.

    2.   Simplify your workspace -

Start by removing unwanted clutter such as paper, organize your area and only concentrate on emails, social media, or projects one at a time. (Don’t work on #Facebook and/or #Twitter at once.)

3. Work through a difficult task - 

Sometimes we push a difficult task aside and tackle something easier. Instead of dealing with it, we continuously put the necessary task off.  There is really no way around it as you are going to have to finish it sooner or later. When this happens, work through it by writing it out and coming up with several solutions.

These are just 3 tips for regaining focus. Let me hear from you on my Facebook and  share some of the ways that you regain focus.

My name is Nicole Updegraff. I am a wife, a mother of 4, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a storyteller, an illustrator and graphic designer, an entrepreneur, a former athlete, an AMAZING dancer, a living room comedian, a beast at Taboo, and an old school r&b guru!

2.   Where does your creative spirit and your love for writing come from?

I’ve always been artistic and for as long as I can remember I’ve had a great ability to express myself well on paper. But this phase of my creative journey was completely kick started by my children.

3.   What do you enjoy most about being an author/illustrator?

I LOVE being able to put words on paper that inspire children and make them feel great about themselves! Illustration gives me an opportunity to bring someone’s vision or idea to life which is really special.

4.   Who has inspired you to follow your dreams?

Well, of course my parents always reinforced the notion that I could do or be ANYTHING and that I was capable of greatness. So they created this little person who felt like nothing was too big for her to tackle.

5.   Did you always want to be an entrepreneur?

No. I always wanted to be the boss, but the idea of becoming an entrepreneur really started with I LOVE my Cotton Candy Hair!

6.   What do you think is the most important key to success?

Well, you have to start! There are so many people who have big dreams and great ideas but they’re waiting. They’re waiting for the perfect time or the perfect circumstances or the perfect account balance, and before they know it five, ten, twenty years have passed. You just have to jump in and put one foot in front of the other. And no matter how long it takes or how many times you stumble, you’ll still be far beyond those who aren’t tying.

7.   What has been your biggest challenge as an entrepreneur?

That’s easy, lol. My biggest challenge has been and still is letting the world know I exist -aka- reaching the masses -bka- marketing!!!

8.   Give us a history about the creation of Cotton Candy Playground. What has the momentum of the company been since creation?

It started with “I LOVE my Cotton Candy Hair!”- the children’s book I wrote and illustrated in response to my three year old’s heartbreaking, teary-eyed plea for “straight and yellow” hair. It slowly manifested itself into a multifaceted brand which includes children’s books, apparel, greeting cards and custom art all focused on loving who you are and celebrating diversity. The momentum has been steady. I see spikes here and there during the holiday season or when I release a new t shirt design, but overall I’m very happy with where we are.

9.   If you could describe your brand in three words, what would they be?

Self love, acceptance.

10. What are the name of your book(s)?  What inspired the names of the apparel collections? Where can they purchase your products?   Where can someone reach on social media?

The books are I LOVE my Cotton Candy Hair! and So what if I have a boy’s name!

There are also 3 others that are untitled . The names for my apparel collections are inspired by the items within each collection and the feelings they invoke. My products can be purchased at www.cottoncandyplayground.com. You can also find me at: facebook.com/cottoncandyplayground, instagram.com/cottoncandyplayground and twitter.com/cottoncandyniki.

11. What advice would you share with women who are trying to have it all, family? career, while pursuing their passion?

First, you have to define what ‘having it all’ means for YOU. I’m okay with the fact that having it all for someone else may be different than what having it all means for me. For someone else it may mean to have the perfect family life and for their business to be the new ‘IT’ thing, right now. For me though, having it all just means happiness. I have 4 young children and a husband who come first so I don’t have an endless amount of time during the day to devote to my business. That means I have to take my time- there is no right now. Would my business be much further along if I could devote the same time? as that of a single, childless person? Of course. But I’m mighty impressed at what I have been able to with my busy little life. And I’m happy. Some might say I don’t have it all-I’m not rich, I’m not balling out of control and my business still has a long way to go. But I’m on the cusp, the things that are most important aren’t being neglected along the way, and I’m happy. So you can’t tell me I don’t have it all. That’s the advice I would give. Forget about other people’s lives or expectations, find what ‘having it all’ means for you and live for that.

12. What advice can you provide to parents who have children that are trying to find the beauty they already have within themselves?

Don’t let a day go by without telling your children how awesome and perfect they are. Put things in front of them (i.e., books, people) that will reinforce that message because please believe they are getting messages elsewhere that aren’t telling them those things. One thing I do is every few nights I have my girls tell me five things that they love about themselves and three things that they know are absolutely true about themselves (no matter what some outsider may think). It’s a way of building a foundation for them where the fact that they are awesome just the way they are is as true as the fact that the sky is blue.

13. What’s on the horizon for you in the very near future?

So many things- YAY! My website has just been made over and I will be launching my new Html site in a matter of days. I’m separating my artwork (which consists of greeting cards, prints, logos, custom commissions) to give it the specialized attention it deserves. This new venture will be called 1a.m. Designs and while it is an affiliate of Cotton Candy Playground it will very much be its own thing . You can check it out at www.1amdesigns.com

14. Lastly, when all is said and done, what do you hope will be your legacy?

I just want to be remembered as someone who made a place where people could come and find things (books, tees, art) that expressed who they were and celebrated diversity, and did it very well.

Let me hear from you. Share your journey with me on my Facebook Page or through my Email. I look forward to hearing from you!

If you are like me, your life looks like this. Most likely there’s work, running errands, dealing with family, catching up with friends, personal projects. social gatherings, and the list goes on and on.  And now it seems as if everything is non-stop and it is all beginning to run into each other.  If that’s the case, that may be a tell-tell sign that you may need more free time in your life ASAP! This is the time to place yourself in time out for a minute to regroup. Here are 3 easy tips that will help you get started.

Everyone is telling that you are always busy

If this sounds familiar: Hi mom, give me a minute and I will call you right back. But right back never happens. Or when you promise to always meet your girlfriends for launch and you constantly cancel.  Don’t write what they are tell you off. Those closest to you may see something that you don’t.  Stop and take day for yourself, go somewhere quiet and re-evaluate your priorities.  Take your life back.

You are always sleepy

No matter how hard your try, you can’t remember when you had a good nights sleep. You are groggy throughout the day and you are always dozing off. Getting plenty of sleep is essential for a person’s health and well-being. Not getting enough can lead to health problems. An easy fix for that is making a schedule for bed time and stick to it no matter what.

You spend your time worrying about time

All I can say for this one is…Really?  If you are constantly worried about your time and checking your schedule, then you really need to take a  break from time itself.  Begin by evaluating your calendar and removing one thing that is least important.   Instead, take that moment and just be present in that moment. Just relaxing and nothing

Those are three simple steps to begin enjoying free time and getting your life back.  Now go to my Facebook Page and tell me what you think. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Take care……smiles

Insert common theme here: ( We have all been there and done that.) Moving on…….

When you momentarily sacrifice  who you are and go against what you believe in, you are  being an unrealistic version of yourself. No matter what the reason may be, don’t compromise yourself in order to be accepted by others. Recognize who you are,  stay true to yourself, and in the long run it will definitely pay off .

With all of second guessing and the need to put your decision off, you are at the same starting point that you were a year ago. STOP.  Own up to your responsibility, take action and do what you are supposed to do. No more excuses. Because if you haven’t guessed by now  the clock doesn’t stop ticking!